100 Egg-cellent Egg Jokes You’ve Never Heard Before

Beyond eggs nutritional value, they can also be quite funny. In fact, there are so many hilarious egg jokes out there that will crack you up (pun intended!).

In this blog post, we’ve rounded up 100 egg-cellent egg jokes that you’ve likely never heard before. Whether you’re looking for funny egg puns, egg riddles, or just plain silly egg humor, you’ll find something here to make you chuckle. Keep scrolling for the ultimate list of funny and clever egg jokes!

Funny Egg Puns

Let’s start with some funny puns featuring our favorite oval-shaped food:

  1. What do you call an egg who’s a pretty good guy? An egg-cellent guy!
  2. My friend got in trouble for bringing eggs to school. It was definitely an egg-spulsion offense.
  3. Want to hear a yolk? I couldn’t come up with any egg puns for this article. I guess my brain is pretty scrambled lately.
  4. What’s the best way to communicate with an egg? Use eggs-pressions!
  5. Why did the egg cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.
  6. What do you call an egg that makes poor choices? A bad egg!
  7. My neighbor asked if he could borrow some eggs. I told him, “Omlette you have three.”
  8. Why was the egg sad? He was feeling a little beaten down.
  9. I wanted to tell my egg some secrets, but I didn’t want to eggs-pose him.
  10. I ran out of eggs this morning and had to ask the neighbor for some. She said, “I only have a few, so I can’t offer you a whole carton. But I’ll give you what I eggs-tra.”
  11. What do you call an egg who works out? Buff egg!
  12. Want to hear a yolk about my trip to the egg farm? Nevermind, it’s too long to eggs-plain here.
  13. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
  14. My friend got hit in the head with an egg yesterday. He’s doing better today though – just a bit scrambled still.
  15. What did the egg say to the boiling water? “It’s going to take a while for me to get hard, I just got laid this morning!”

Egg Riddles

Riddle me this – can you solve these tricky egg riddles?

  1. What has to be broken before you can use it? An egg.
  2. I’m white on the outside and yellow on the inside. Crack me open to find out! Egg.
  3. I’m formed in a hen, brought forth with a squawk. You can scramble or fry me, but I’ll never walk. What am I? An egg.
  4. Two parts make me whole, my outer case I lack. Tap gently on my crown, and see my treasures crack. What am I? An egg.
  5. Somedays I stand up tall, other days I lay down low. I’m not hairy or furry, but a shell I do grow. What am I? An egg.
  6. I’m oval in shape, with a delicate case. Crack me open, your hunger I’ll face. Over easy or sunny side up, however you please. Now guess what I am, won’t you please? An egg.
  7. Translucent and small, protect me or I’ll fall. Break me open to find something round. Fry me, bake me, even beat me around! What am I? An egg.
  8. I’m not a bird, but I can fly. My home is a nest, where I lie. Crack open my shell, take a peek. See my yellow yolk – now guess what I be! An egg.
  9. I’m laid by a hen for your breakfast time ease. I can be scrambled, fried, poached, or boiled with ease. What am I? An egg.
  10. Crack me into a pan and I’ll sizzle away. Add me to cake batter before you bake. What am I that comes from a chicken each day? An egg!
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Silly Egg Jokes

Now let’s get a bit silly with these funny egg jokes:

  1. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi!
  2. Why was the photographer annoying during breakfast? He kept photo-bombing everyone’s eggs!
  3. Why did the chicken stop crossing the road? He wanted to lay it low for a while.
  4. What do you get if you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A hot cross bunny!
  5. Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of socks? In case he got a hole-in-one!
  6. What building in a city has the most stories? The library!
  7. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot!
  8. Where does a sheep go for a haircut? To the baa-baa shop!
  9. What happens when you tell a joke to an egg? It cracks up!
  10. Why did the egg cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
  11. What do you call an egg that’s afraid of heights? Chicken!
  12. What do you get if you cross a chicken with a duck? A bird that get’s up at the quack of dawn!
  13. Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall? To make up for his miserable summer!
  14. Which side of an egg has the most feathers? The outside!
  15. How did the bacon fix the egg’s crack? With a little pork!
  16. What do you get if you cross a rooster and a duck? A bird that wakes you up at the quack of dawn!
  17. How do you make a slow egg fast? You egg-celerate it!
  18. Why couldn’t the sesame seed leave the casino? Because he was on a roll.
  19. What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you? Nacho cheese!
  20. Why do fish swim in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!

Funny Egg Knock-Knocks

Knock knock! Who’s there? Some egg-stra funny egg jokesters, that’s who!

  1. Knock knock. Who’s there? Howard. Howard who? Howard you like some eggs for breakfast?
  2. Knock knock. Who’s there? Jimmy. Jimmy who? Jimmy some eggs and I’ll make an omelette!
  3. Knock knock. Who’s there? A broken pencil. A broken pencil who? Never mind, it’s pointless!
  4. Knock knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!
  5. Knock knock. Who’s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, cows go moo!
  6. Knock knock. Who’s there? Amish. Amish who? Wow, you don’t get out much do you?
  7. Knock knock. Who’s there? Etch. Etch who? Bless you!
  8. Knock knock. Who’s there? A pile up. A pile up who? Eww, I hope you’re feeling better soon!
  9. Knock knock. Who’s there? Dish. Dish who? Dish a really bad joke!
  10. Knock knock. Who’s there? Cash. Cash who? No thanks, I’d rather have some peanuts!
  11. Knock knock. Who’s there? Anita. Anita who? Anita use the bathroom, let me in!
  12. Knock knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you so much!
  13. Knock knock. Who’s there? lettuce. lettuce who? Lettuce in and you’ll find out!
  14. Knock knock. Who’s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, cows go “Moo!”
  15. Knock knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Don’t cry, it’s just a yolk!
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Funny Egg Poems

Roses are red, violets are blue, these egg poems are silly, so have a good chuckle or two!

  1. Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

All the king’s horses and all the king’s men,

Couldn’t put Humpty together again.

  1. Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet,

Eating her curds and whey.

Along came a spider who sat down beside her,

And frightened Miss Muffet away!

  1. Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle,

The cow jumped over the moon.

The little dog laughed to see such sport,

And the dish ran away with the spoon!

  1. Jack and Jill went up the hill

To fetch a pail of water.

Jack fell down and broke his crown,

And Jill came tumbling after.

  1. There was an old woman who lived in a shoe.

She had so many children, she didn’t know what to do!

She gave them some broth without any bread,

Whipped them all and sent them to bed!

Fun Egg Facts

Let’s switch gears and crack open some fascinating egg facts!

  1. Chicken eggs come in different colors – white, brown, blue, or green!
  2. The world record for the most eggs laid by a chicken in one day is 7 eggs!
  3. A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, while a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs.
  4. Eggshell color depends on the breed of the chicken – it has nothing to do with egg quality or taste.
  5. On average, a hen lays about 250-300 eggs per year. That’s about 1 egg every 1-2 days!
  6. The largest chicken egg on record weighed nearly 12 ounces – that’s about a quarter pound!
  7. Egg shells contain calcium carbonate – that’s why they’re great for pet snails and birds to peck at for nutrients.
  8. You can tell if an egg is fresh by submerging it in water – fresh eggs sink, while old eggs float.
  9. The world record for fastest time to peel 50 boiled eggs is 1 minute, 6 seconds!
  10. It would take about 2 weeks for a hen to fully form an egg before it’s laid.
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Egg Joke FAQs

Here are some frequently asked questions about egg jokes to crack this post wide open:

Why are eggs so funny?

Eggs are incredibly versatile as joke fodder. Their oval shape lends itself well to physical humor and slapstick. The fact that they break easily also leaves lots of opportunity for funny punchlines when eggs crack unexpectedly. And eggs are also great for wordplay and puns due to their rhyming name.

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

This classic question sets up the ultimate chicken vs. egg dilemma. Scientifically speaking, the egg came first, as eggs evolved long before the chicken. But eggs still need chickens to lay them, so it’s quite the egg-istential quandary!

How do you tell egg jokes politely?

When telling egg jokes, especially puns, make sure the “yolks” don’t come across as mean-spirited or offensive. Keep the humor light-hearted and inclusive of all audiences. And don’t bombard listeners with too many egg puns – delivering them in moderation keeps the humor fun.

What are some funny egg jokes to tell kids?

Kids love silly jokes and egg puns! Some kid-friendly options include:

  • Where does a chicken bake a cake? In an egg-oven!
  • What do you get if you cross a detective with an egg? Sherlock Yolks!
  • What do you call a fake egg? An eggs-aggeration!
  • Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!

What’s the best way to crack an egg joke?

Come equipped with plenty of options, read the room, and deliver the jokes confidently with perfect comedic timing. Pausing for effect between set up and punchline helps highlight the humor. And don’t lay it on thick – stop after 1 or 2 jokes and see if you get laughs or groans before cracking another egg joke!

So there you have it – 100 egg-ceptionally funny egg jokes you’ve likely never heard before! Whether you’re making breakfast, need some laughs, or just want to annoy someone with egg-centric puns, this list has got you covered. Just be careful not to egg-sceed with the yolks – unless you’re prepared to deal with some cranky chickens! Now get cracking and spread the egg joke cheer!