If you love engineering humor or just enjoy a good laugh, this collection of 100 engineering jokes has something for everyone. Get ready to bust a gut laughing!
Engineers are known for their analytical minds, love of technology, and sometimes quirky senses of humor. While engineering is a serious profession that requires intense study and discipline, engineers do like to have fun and crack jokes when they can.
Funny Engineering Jokes
- Why did the engineer cross the road? To get to the other side and examine it.
- What do you call an engineer who doesn’t know what he’s doing? Normal.
- Why do engineers confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.
- What’s an engineer’s favorite place to hang out? The localhost.
- Why did the engineer wear only one sock? Because he heard computers should have cache.
- How do you know an engineer designed your car? It has crumple zones in the rear bumper for when you back into things.
- Why do engineers constantly mix up Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct31 = Dec25.
- How do you stop an engineer from drowning? Take your foot off his head.
- What do you call a programmer who sleeps all day? A Java developer.
- My software engineer friend recently got a tattoo of a USB symbol on his arm. I said, “Why did you get that?” He replied, “It’s meant to represent how I strive to be plug and play.”
- What’s the object-oriented way to become wealthy? Inheritance.
- An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, pub, tavern, public house, Irish pub, drinks, beer, alcohol.
- Why did the developer go broke? Because he used up all his cache.
- A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv.
- Why are software developer resolutions so hard to keep? They always end up being debugged.
- I had a problem so I called my programmer friend. He told me to reboot my computer and call back if there was still an issue. I’m not sure – I didn’t call back and the problem seems to have resolved itself.
- Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they can’t C#.
- A product manager, a UI designer, and a developer walk into a bar. They each order a beer. Three hours later, the UI designer’s beer arrives. It has a coaster under it.
- Knock Knock! Who’s there? C++. C++ who? C++ you later!
- Why was the engineer unhappy at his job? He felt marginalized.
- Why do engineers make bad lovers? They’re only interested in the process, not the results.
- What’s the object-oriented way to become wealthy? Inheritance.
- A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv.
- How do you tell an introverted engineer from an extroverted engineer? The extroverted engineer looks at YOUR shoes when he talks to you.
- To understand what recursion is, you must first understand recursion.
Engineering Student Jokes
- Student: “Would I be able to take Engineering drawing again?” University: “You may retake it, but you will not earn any credits from taking it a second time.” Student: “I don’t need credits, I just can’t take anymore of those isometric views!”
- Engineering student: “Pass or fail, either way I’m getting wasted tonight.”
- A professor asks a student: “Did you sleep with the textbook last night?” Student: “No sir, I slept with the TA.”
- Engineering Professor: “You’re late!” Student: “Why? Is there some class before this one?”
- A sociology professor, management professor, and engineering professor are arguing over whose course is the most difficult. The sociology professor argues, “My job requires me to study complex human interactions and culture.” The management professor scoffs, “That’s nothing. I have to make strategic business decisions and manage people.” The engineer just laughs and says, “I have to deal with fluids and thermodynamics at 8am.”
- What’s the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.
- Did you hear about the first year engineering student who thought his professors actually cared about him as an individual? Yeah, he won’t make that mistake again.
- A mechanical engineering student was walking across campus when his friend, an electrical engineering student, came running up to him with tears in his eyes. “What’s wrong?” the mechanical engineer asked. “I just got back my first exam grade in Professor voltage’s class and got a 10 out of 100!” the electrical engineer sobbed. The mechanical engineer put his arm around his friend’s shoulder and sighed, “I understand, getting a tough grade on your first college exam is a shock. But you’ll get through this!” “No, you don’t understand,” replied the electrical engineer, “that was out of 10 possible points!”
- How many engineers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, that’s what the technicians are for.
- Did you hear about the civil engineer who got an electric shock and died? All he had to do was follow the current.
- Why did the mechanical engineer break up with the nuclear engineer? There was too much fallout!
- What do mechanical engineers use for birth control? Their personalities.
- What’s the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.
- Why did the computer engineering student get hit by a car? He couldn’t handle the bus cycle frequency on the road.
- The difference between a bad electrical engineering joke and a good computing joke? One megabyte.
Workplace and Professional Engineering Jokes
- What does a baby computer call its father? Data.
- Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.
- A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv.
- How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, it’s a hardware issue.
- A programmer’s wife tells them to go to the store and “get a loaf of bread, and if they have eggs, get a dozen.” The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.
- How do two programmers make a baby? They integrate their APIs.
- What’s the best thing about UDP jokes? I don’t care if you don’t get them.
- Three engineers are discussing how God created human beings. The mechanical engineer says, “God must have used a mechanical process for assembling parts.” The electrical engineer says, “No, electrical signals traveling through the nerves and muscles must be how it was done.” The software engineer says, “You’re both wrong. God wrote the human body code in JavaScript. That’s why he did it in seven days – debugging the code took six days and creating the UI took one day.”
- Why do Java developers wear glasses? Cause they can’t C#.
- A QA engineer walks into a bar. Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv.
- There are 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.
- Why was the developer unhappy at his job? He felt marginalized.
- Question: Why did the software engineer quit his job? Answer: Because he didn’t get arrays.
- What’s the object-oriented way to become wealthy? Inheritance.
- Why couldn’t the React component render correctly? It had invalid props.
- Why was the mobile app developer barefoot? He couldn’t handle the boot load time.
- An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, pub, tavern, public house, drinks, beer, alcohol.
- A product manager told the engineer, “the specs are complete, so code the design.” The engineer replied, “give me one more day.” The next day the engineer resigned.
- Why do software engineers confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.
- How does a developer make a cheerleader happy? With lots of spirit!
Engineering Professor Jokes
- First year engineering student: “These classes are so hard!” Final year engineering student: “Which ones?”
- Electrical Engineering professor: “What is conductivity?” Student: “Uh…” EE professor: “Okay, what is insanity?” Student: “When you do the same thing over and over expecting different results…” EE professor: “So…what is conductivity?”
- Engineering professor: “A material has a tensile strength of 75 pascals and a shear strength of 50 pascals. What is this material?” Student: “Um, hard to tear and easy to share?”
- Thermodynamics professor: “Explain the first law of thermodynamics.” Student: “Well…heat and work go in, heat and work come out, you can’t win and you can’t break even.”
- Materials Science Professor: Today we will learn about the hardness of materials. Mechanical Engineering Student: giggles uncontrollably
- Engineering Professor: “Here is a simple circuit. Can anyone tell me what would happen if I removed the 8-ohm resistor?” Student: “You wouldn’t be able to complete the circuit because there would be too much resistance.”
- A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer are asked: “What is 2 + 2?” The mathematician says “Let’s define 2, let’s define addition…” The physicist does some measurements and says “Approximately 4, within standard error.” The engineer stands up, walks to the chalkboard, and works out: 2 + 2 = ?
- Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, “Where did you get such a great bike?” The second engineer replied, “Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, “Take what you want.” The second engineer nodded approvingly. “Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”
- Engineering Professor: “A material’s ultimate strength is-” Student: giggles Engineering Professor (annoyed): “Yes, ultimate. There are only so many ways to say ‘tensile strength at fracture’!”
- Why do engineers confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct31 = Dec25!
Civil Engineering Jokes
- Why was the civil engineer sad after getting a raise? Because it was still below the median salary.
- How do you recognize a civil engineering major? They carry a transit rod and look down a lot.
- Civil Engineer (holding a steel rod): This can support over 8,000 pounds without any deformation. Architect: Great, can we use it as a 600-foot long cantilever beam jutting straight out of a skyscraper?
- Why did the civil engineer bring a stethoscope to work? So he could listen for traffic below the bridge.
- Where does a 500 pound civil engineer sleep? Anywhere he wants to.
- The optimist sees a glass half full. The pessimist sees it half empty. The civil engineer sees it twice as large as it needs to be.
- Why did the civil engineer cross the road? To get to the middle.
- How do you recognize a civil engineering major? They carry a transit rod and look down a lot.
- How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars (scissors).
- Why can’t civil engineers tell a joke timing? They spend too much time calculating the reactions for the punchline mechanism.
Mechanical Engineering Jokes
- A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a civil engineer were arguing about which of their disciplines was most important historically. “Surely civil engineering is the oldest and greatest,” argued the civil engineer. “After all, before the beginning of time, chaos reigned and the earth was void and without form – we civil engineers designed and created the Earth.” The mechanical engineer challenged him, “But after the earth was created, it was a chaotic mess of gas, water, and solids. It was mechanical engineers who designed the laws of physics that organized the Earth into its perfect order.” But the electrical engineer scoffed at them both. “Before there was light and energy, what use was the Earth? It was electrical engineers who harnessed the lightning bolt that illuminated the vast universe.” Their bickering was suddenly interrupted by the explosion of a nearby supernova. As debris rained down around them, they ran screaming into the primitive shelter of a cave. Deep within the cave they cowered in silence, until the civil engineer whispered, “Uh, guys? I think we should get some structural engineers in here to check this place out.”
- What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.
- Why couldn’t the welder engineer start his car? Because he was out of ohms.
- Why did the mechanical engineer break up with the nuclear engineer? There was too much fallout!
- What’s the difference between a mechanical engineer and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family.
- A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man below. She shouted, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.” The man looked at his GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.” She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be an engineer.” “I am,” replied the man, “How did you know?” The woman answered, “Well everything you told me is technically correct, but I’ve no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help at all. If anything, you’ve delayed my trip with your talk.” The man smiled and responded, “You must be in management.” “I am,” replied the balloonist, “but how did you know?” “Well,” said the man, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you’ve no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it’s my fault.”
- Why can’t you trust engineers? Because they always make up their own formulas.
- Why do mechanical engineers constantly mix up Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct31 = Dec25!
- How many mechanical engineers does it take to change a light bulb? Eight. One to decide the stresses and torques, one to research light bulbs, one to design the tools, one to manufacture the tools, one to build test equipment, one to disassemble light bulb, one to install the new light bulb, and one to document the process.
- The optimist sees a glass half full. The pessimist sees it half empty. The mechanical engineer sees it twice as large as it needs to be.
Chemical Engineering Jokes
- A chemist walks into the bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, “Here, this one’s on the house!” The chemist thanks the bartender and rushes back into the lab to analyze the contents.
- What do chemical engineers and McDonald’s drive thrus have in common? They both use flow control to optimize interactions between fluids and solids.
- Question: Why can’t you trust atoms? Answer: Because they make up everything.
- A physicist, an electrical engineer, and a chemical engineer were arguing about which of their professions was the oldest. The physicist said physics was the oldest since Newton and Galileo pioneered modern science. The electrical engineer said Faraday discovered electricity in 1831, so electrical engineering was the oldest. The chemical engineer just smiled and said, “Yes, but who do you think made the chaos in the first place?”
- A chemist, a chemical engineer, and a physicist were stranded on a desert island. They gathered what little food they could find, canned water, and salvaged materials to try to figure out a way off the island. The chemist said, “I will use these materials to synthesize complex chemicals!” The chemical engineer said, “I will build chemical processing equipment to efficiently produce the chemicals we need!” The physicist said, “First, assume a spherical island…”
- What’s the difference between a chemist and a chemical engineer? If you need a vial of benzene, ask a chemist. If you need a tanker of benzene, ask a chemical engineer.
- Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia? It’s pretty basic stuff.
- Never trust atoms – they make up everything.
- Two hydrogen atoms bond together. One says, “I’ve lost an electron.” The other says “Are you sure?” The first replies “I’m positive.”
FAQ About Engineering Jokes
Q: Why are engineering jokes so popular?
Engineering jokes poke fun at stereotypes and play into the humorous side of engineering professionals. They allow engineers to take a break from their intense coursework or jobs. The jokes highlight funny situations that engineers can relate to in their academics and careers.
Q: What are some common themes in engineering jokes?
Here are some common themes in engineering jokes:
- Difficulty of engineering classes and homework
- Complex math and science concepts
- Socially awkward or nerdy engineers
- Confusing technical jargon
- Engineers overthinking simple problems
- Different engineering disciplines competing or arguing
- Engineers having questionable dating/social lives
- Engineers taking things overly literally
Q: What are the major branches of engineering?
The major branches of engineering include:
- Civil engineering – Design and construction of infrastructure like roads, bridges, dams
- Mechanical engineering – Design of physical/mechanical systems like machines, manufacturing
- Electrical engineering – Design of electrical systems and components like circuits, robotics
- Chemical engineering – Design and operation of processes involving chemicals and biology
- Aerospace/aeronautical engineering – Design of aircraft, spacecraft, and related technologies
- Biomedical engineering – Application of engineering to medicine and healthcare
- Computer engineering – Design of computer hardware and software systems
Q: What’s the difference between electrical and computer engineering?
Electrical engineering focuses more on electrical systems and components like circuits, sensors, and signal processing. Computer engineering overlaps with electrical engineering but focuses on the design and programming of computer hardware and software.
Q: Who typically enjoys engineering jokes?
Engineering jokes tend to appeal most to engineering students and professionals who can relate to the stereotypes and situations. But many non-engineers also enjoy the jokes, especially if they know engineers. People appreciate the creativity and humor in engineering jokes.
Q: Are engineering jokes only for engineers?
Definitely not! While engineers are usually the target audience, engineering jokes are open for anyone to appreciate and enjoy. In fact, explaining engineering jokes to non-engineers can be a great way to bridge the communication gap between technical and non-technical people. The jokes can reveal the funny side of engineers.
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