The holiday season is here! So get ready to laugh, cringe and groan as we present 100 of the best Detty December jokes to spice up your holiday fun! From innocent Christmas humor to adult jokes loaded with innuendos, this list has something for everyone. Caution – don’t read further if you’re easily offended!

Christmas Jokes

The Christmas holiday is filled with joyful and innocent humor. Get your dose of clean comedy with these Christmas jokes!

1. What do you call an old snowman? Water!
2. What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Snowflakes.
3. Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.
4. What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective? Santa Clues!
5. Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can ho-ho-ho!
6. What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.
7. Why is Christmas just like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
8. Why does Santa have a big garden? To hoe-hoe-hoe!
9. What do you call a cat on Christmas Eve? Sandy Claws!
10. Why did no one bid for Rudolph and Santa on eBay? Because they were two deer!

Dirty Santa Jokes

The holiday season also brings out the naughty humor in all of us. Get ready to blush and laugh out loud with these dirty Santa jokes!

11. What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa when she looked up in the sky? Looks like rain, dear!
12. Why is Santa so jolly? He knows where all the naughty girls live.
13. What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
14. What do you call an elf who sings? A wrapper!
15. Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him!
16. Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only comes once a year!
17. What do Santa’s little helpers learn at school? The elf-abet!
18. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
19. What do snowmen wear on their heads? Ice caps!
20. How do snowmen get around? By riding an icicle!

Christmas Food Jokes

‘Tis the season for indulging in delicious holiday treats! Celebrate with funny jokes about Christmas food.

21. Why did no one bid for a steak dinner on eBay? Because it was a meal deal!
22. Why did the gingerbread man go to the doctor? He was feeling crummy!
23. What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an iPad? A pineapple!
24. Why are Christmas trees bad at sewing? They always drop their needles!
25. Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him!
26. What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective? Santa Clues!
27. Why did Scrooge love Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer? Because every buck was deer to him!
28. Why was the snowman looking through the carrots in the fridge? He was picking his nose!
29. Why was the turkey in the pop group? Because he was the only one with drumsticks!
30. Why does Santa have three gardens? So he can hoe hoe hoe!

Christmas Elf Jokes

Santa’s little helpers always provide amusement with their antics. Enjoy these funny elf jokes perfect for some holiday humor.

31. What do you call an elf who sings? A wrapper!
32. What do you call an elf who just graduated from medical school? A first-year resident!
33. How do elves get up to the roof to work? They elfavators!
34. What did the elf say was the first step in using a computer? Just elf yourself!
35. Why do elves wear tight shoes? No elfy likes a floppy slipper!
36. How do you help an elf who’s gone blind? Re-elf them!
37. What’s an elf’s favorite sport? North pole vaulting!
38. How did the elf become a great rapper? He learned how to spittin’ mad rhymes!
39. Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? He had low elf esteem.
40. What’s an elf’s favorite make of car? A mistle-Toyota!

Christmas Party Jokes

The holiday party season brings plenty of punchlines and laughter. Enjoy these Christmas party jokes guaranteed to sleigh your friends!

41. Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? He had low elf esteem.
42. What’s the best Christmas present in the world? A broken drum, you just can’t beat it!
43. What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsilitis!
44. What do you call a train loaded with toffee? A chew chew train!
45. Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him!
46. Why are Christmas trees very bad at sewing? They always drop their needles!
47. What do you call an elf who just graduated from medical school? A first-year resident!
48. Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can hoe-hoe-hoe!
49. What do you get if you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
50. Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas party? He had no-body to go with!

Dirty Christmas Jokes for Adults

Want to really turn up the heat this holiday season? Check out these dirty adult Christmas jokes full of naughty humor!

51. What do you call two peas in a pod who fell in love? Sweet and petite!
52. What do you call a snowman with a six pack? An ice man!
53. How is Christmas exactly like your job? You do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets the credit.
54. Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.
55. Why does Santa have such a big sack? Because he only comes once a year!
56. How do you know when you’re kissing Santa Claus? When you feel your wet nose against his flaky white beard.
57. What does Mrs. Claus see when she looks up at the sky? Hard rock candy!
58. How is a Christmas tree like a priest? They both have ornamental balls.
59. Why should you be wary chugging eggnog at the office Christmas party? It might be spiked with sperm nog!
60. Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas? Santa Jaws!

Christmas Puns

Puns and holiday humor go together like cookies and milk. Enjoy this collection of groan-worthy Christmas puns!

61. What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus!
62. Why was it so hot in the reindeer stable? All the reindeer were having a meltdown!
63. Why are Christmas trees very bad at sewing? They always drop their needles!
64. What’s the most popular wine at Christmas? ‘I don’t give a figgy pudding!’
65. How do sheep say Merry Christmas in Mexico? Fleece Navidad!
66. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.
67. How much did Santa pay to park his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house!
68. Why did Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer? Because every buck was dear to him!
69. Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can hoe hoe hoe!
70. Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him!

Christmas Knock Knock Jokes

Knock knock! Who’s there? Check out these silly Christmas knock knock jokes guaranteed to sleigh.

71. Knock knock! Who’s there? Donut. Donut who? Donut open until Christmas!
72. Knock knock! Who’s there? Avery. Avery who? Avery merry Christmas!
73. Knock knock! Who’s there? Layla. Layla who? Layla on the table, it’s Christmas dinner!
74. Knock knock! Who’s there? Ice. Ice who? Ice skating with Santa!
75. Knock knock! Who’s there? Ida. Ida who? Ida know it’s Christmas already!
76. Knock knock! Who’s there? Snow. Snow who? Snow time like the present to celebrate Christmas!
77. Knock knock! Who’s there? Ivana. Ivana who? Ivana wish you a Merry Christmas!
78. Knock knock! Who’s there? Nollaig. Nollaig who? Nollaig back and ask me that again, I didn’t hear you!
79. Knock knock! Who’s there? Alpine. Alpine who? Alpine the halls with boughs of holly!
80. Knock knock! Who’s there? Yule. Yule who? Yule be kissing under the mistletoe this Christmas!

Christmas Riddles

Riddle me this – what’s more fun than Christmas riddles? Enjoy solving this collection of holiday brain teasers!

81. What falls at the North Pole but never gets hurt? Snow!
82. What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Snowflakes!
83. The more of them you take, the more you leave behind. What are they? Footsteps.
84. What has arms and legs but no hands and feet? A chair!
85. Where does a snowman keep his money? In a snow bank!
86. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
87. What goes up when rain comes down? An umbrella.
88. What starts with ‘E’ but only has a single letter in it? An envelope.
89. What has a face and two hands but no arms or legs? A clock!
90. What gets wetter the more it dries? A towel.

Christmas Jokes for Kids

Share some wholesome holiday humor with the little ones in your life! Here are kid-friendly Christmas jokes.

91. Who is Santa’s favorite singer? Elf-is Presley!
92. What do you call an old snowman? Puddle!
93. What goes “Oh, Oh, Oh”? Santa walking backwards!
94. What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack!
95. Where do mistletoe go to become famous? Holly-wood!
96. What do you call a bankrupt Santa? Saint Nickel-less!
97. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!
98. Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing? They always drop their needles!
99. What do you call an elf who sings? A wrapper!
100. What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus!

FAQs About Detty December Joke

Here are answers to some frequently asked questions about Detty December jokes:

What types of jokes are popular for Detty December?

As seen in the examples above, typical Detty Detty December jokes involve sexual innuendo, funny puns on Christmas themes, dirty adult humor, Santa jokes with R-rated twists, booze-related jokes, and overall naughty jokes loaded with banter perfect for turning up during the holiday season.

Are Detty December jokes offensive?

Some Detty December jokes are quite explicit, vulgar and offensive. The level of offensiveness depends on each specific joke, the context, audience, sensibilities involved etc. Most people see Detty jokes as lighthearted fun for adults, but they may be inappropriate around kids or easily offended people.

What other humor is popular around Detty December?

Besides outright jokes and one-liners, memes, comical images, parody songs, humorous Detty December quotes and banter exchanged on social media are also a popular way Nigerians add humor to their holiday festivities.

Are Detty December jokes only for adults?

A lot of Detty December humor involves dirty references or adult concepts. So these jokes tend to be most popular among older teens and adults. But there are also some kid-friendly jokes about Christmas puns, Santa, reindeer etc that children can enjoy.

How can I share these December jokes?

You can share the jokes above on social media, messaging apps or by word of mouth. Around Christmas gatherings and Detty December parties, having a few funny jokes handy can be a great way to spark conversations, laughter and connection among friends and family.

We hope this collection of 100 jokes has provided lots of comic relief and laughter to spice up your Detty December vibe! As you prepare to turn up this holiday season, keep the hilarious punchlines and dirty banter flowing with these festive gags guaranteed to sleigh any crowd.