Fitness Lifestyle

50 Mexican Jokes To Brighten Your Day!

Whether you’re looking to add some comedy to a celebration or just brighten your day, this list of 100 funny Mexican Jokes Mexican jokes has something for everyone. Get ready to get your grin on with these funny quips, hilarious one-liners, and amusing anecdotes. ¡Que te diviertas!

Clean Jokes

These family-friendly jokes are sure to get some chuckles without offending anyone. Lighthearted and fun, they’re suitable for kids and easily shared in most settings.

  1. Why does a Mexican grill have to be so clean? Because it’s a “squeaky clean” quesadilla!
  2. Why did the salsa dancer keep tripping up? Because she kept dippin’ her chip!
  3. Why was the Mexican chef so hopeless in the kitchen? He kept dropping the taco!
  4. Why do Mexicans make the best mathematicians? They always manage to taco ’bout numbers!
  5. What did the Mexican say to the house that fell on him? Get off me, casa!
  6. Why did the burrito get a job as a reporter? It wanted to be a rapper!
  7. What do you call a sleeping Mexican? A siesta!
  8. Why do Mexicans make the best gardeners? They know how to spice things up!
  9. What happens when you give a Mexican a calculator? They turn it into a multipli-quacamole!
  10. Why did the Mexican take Xanax? For Hispanic attacks!
  11. How does a Mexican cut his pizza? With little Caesars!
  12. What do you call a Mexican who lost his car? Carlos!
  13. Why did the Mexican throw his wife off the bridge? ¡Tequila!
  14. What do you call a Mexican in space? An astronau-taco!
  15. What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Roberto!
  16. Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff? ¡Tequila!
  17. Why can’t Mexicans play uno? Because they steal all the green cards!
  18. What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons? Hose A and Hose B!
  19. Why do Mexicans eat tamales on Christmas? Because it’s tradition-ole!
  20. What do you call a sleeping Mexican? A siesta!
  21. Why don’t Mexicans barbecue? The beans fall through the grill!
  22. What do you call a pirate Mexican? Capt’n Crunch!
  23. What do you call a Mexican phone? Juan call!
  24. Why do Mexicans never finish school? They get deported!
  25. What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Roberto!

Funny Mexican Jokes

These jokes may push the boundaries of political correctness, but their playful stereotypes and amusing puns will have you chuckling in no time. Just don’t repeat them around the easily offended!

  1. What do you call a sophisticated Mexican? Sophisti-quated!
  2. What do you call a blind Mexican? No se!
  3. Why do Mexicans re-fry their beans? Have you seen a Mexican do anything right the first time?
  4. Why do Mexicans eat tamales on Christmas? So they have something to unwrap!
  5. What do you call a building full of Mexicans? Jail!
  6. What do you call 100 Mexicans in quicksand? A good start!
  7. How do you starve a Mexican? Put their food stamps under their work boots!
  8. What do Mexicans and cue balls have in common? The harder you hit them, the more English you get out of them!
  9. How do you stop a Mexican tank? Shoot the guy who’s pushing it!
  10. Why don’t Mexicans barbecue? The beans keep falling through the grill!
  11. What’s the difference between a Mexican and an elevator? One can raise a child!
  12. What do you call a Mexican baptism? Bean dip!
  13. How do you get 50 Mexicans in a car? Throw a penny in it.
  14. Why do Mexicans walk around with their towels? In case they have to clean their car on the way home!
  15. What do you call a Mexican with a vasectomy? Dry Martinez!
  16. Why do Mexicans eat tamales for Christmas? So they’ll have something to unwrap!
  17. What’s the difference between boy scouts and Mexicans? Boy scouts have adult supervision!
  18. Why doesn’t Mexico have an Olympic team? Everyone who can run, jump or swim is already in the U.S!
  19. What do you call a Mexican with a clipboard and law degree? Your honor!
  20. What’s the difference between a Mexican and an elevator? One can raise a child!
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Longer Mexican Jokes

These longer jokes build on amusing situational humor and unexpected punchlines. Settle in and enjoy these extended laughs!

  1. Juan was a handsome and charming young Mexican man. He wanted to impress the young ladies, so he got a big tattoo of a hand imprint on his chest. He hoped they would be intrigued and ask him about it.

One day, Juan went to the beach and met a beautiful Latina named Gabriella. She had sparkling dark eyes and a dazzling smile. Juan flexed his chest muscles trying to draw her attention to his tattoo. Gabriella noticed and asked him what it was.

Juan was thrilled she asked. He said, “I got this tattoo in honor of my best friend Pedro. One night, Pedro was very drunk and stumbled into the road and got hit by a taxi cab. He was lying there dying and with the last ounce of strength he had, he reached up and put his hand on my chest, as I knelt beside him. When the ambulance came, Pedro had died, and his handprint stayed on my chest.”

Gabriella’s eyes started to tear up, moved by the profound story. Juan knew he had impressed her greatly.

Gabriella then said, “That must have been horrible for you! But tell me my macho man, why is the handprint on your chest, and not on your back where Pedro must have touched you?”

Juan just looked down sheepishly with disappointment.

  1. A married couple were out dining at a Mexican restaurant for their anniversary. After enjoying some nachos and churros, the wife noticed a familiar face at the bar. It was her husband’s ex-girlfriend from college, Olivia.

The wife felt jealous, worrying that her husband might still have feelings for Olivia. She leaned over the table and said to her husband Miguel, “I noticed Olivia, your ex-girlfriend from college, at the bar. Did you see her?”

Miguel replied, “Yes, I did see her. And she looked terrible. She really let herself go and got so fat.”

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The wife felt relieved. She thought, “At least I don’t have to worry about Miguel wanting Olivia back. He clearly thinks she looks awful.”

The wife smiled and said, “You’re right Miguel, Olivia used to be so gorgeous. It’s too bad she looks so rough now.”

Over at the bar, Olivia had tears running down her face. She said to the bartender Pepe, “That’s so sweet of them to say I used to be gorgeous, even if I’ve put on some weight.”

  1. Jose was a young Mexican man looking for work. He saw a help wanted ad at a gardening store so applied for the job. The manager, Mr. Smith, decided to give him an interview.

Mr. Smith said, “So tell me Jose, do you have any experience with gardening or landscaping?” Jose responded, “Oh sí, growing up my family had a lovely garden with so many flowers and vegetables in México.”

Mr. Smith then picked up a potted plant from his desk and held it in front of Jose. He asked, “Okay, so can you identify what type of plant this is?”

Jose looked closely at the plant, gently rubbed its leaves and took a long sniff. He said, “Ah yes, this looks to be marijuana!”

Mr. Smith’s eyes widened in shock and he yelled, “Get out of my office and don’t come back!”

Jose shouted on his way out, “Hey it’s not my fault you don’t know what your own plants are gringo!”

  1. A Mexican man named Ernesto was feeling very ill so he went to see a doctor. The doctor ran some tests and came back with a grim diagnosis. He told Ernesto, “I’m so sorry to tell you this, but you have a serious disease and only have 6 months left to live.”

Ernesto was devastated by the news. He walked sadly out of the doctor’s office and headed to his favorite cantina to drown his sorrows in tequila. He told the bartender Diego about his fate, and that he only had 6 months left to live.

Diego felt sympathy and poured Ernesto’s drinks on the house. After a few hours of drinking, Ernesto seemed to perk up. He told Diego he appreciated the free drinks, and that getting tipsy helped him realized he needed to make the most of the time he had left.

A few days later, Ernesto came back beaming with excitement. He said to Diego, “I can’t believe it! I went to another doctor for a second opinion, and he told me I have 6 weeks left to live. I gained 5 and half months to live!”

  1. An American man named John was vacationing alone in Mexico. While walking on the beach one day, he found an old lamp buried in the sand. He rubbed the lamp, and a genie magically appeared!

The genie said, “Thank you for freeing me from my lamp! In return I will grant you three wishes.”

John thought carefully and said, “For my first wish, I want to be fabulously wealthy.” The genie snapped his fingers, and a Swiss bank account in John’s name appeared with billions of dollars in it.

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For his second wish John said, “I want to be irresistible to women.” The genie made it so women would flock to John and find him charming.

For his third wish, John said, “I’ve always wanted to visit Hawaii but I’m afraid of flying. I wish for a road to be built from here in Mexico all the way to Hawaii so I can drive there!”

The genie shouted, “That’s impossible! The ocean is too deep to build a road across!”

John shrugged and said, “Well then, I guess I’ll just have to settle for two out of three wishes. Thanks anyway!”

FAQs About Mexican Jokes

Still curious to learn more? Check out these frequently asked questions about Mexican jokes Mexican jokes.

Are Mexican jokes offensive?

This depends on the specific joke. Some play on harmless stereotypes without ill intent. However, jokes promoting harmful stereotypes or ridiculing aspects of Mexican culture can certainly be seen as offensive. Consider your audience before sharing and stay away from mean-spirited or overly insensitive humor.

What are some common themes in Mexican jokes?

Jokes about Mexicans frequently touch on stereotypes (both positive and negative) including accents, naps/siestas, Latin lovers, drinking tequila, crossing the US border illegally, being short, and working landscaping or construction jobs. More creative jokes find humor in Mexican names, Spanish words, or cultural traditions.

Are “Juan” jokes about Mexicans?

Yes, jokes that substitute the name “Juan” are implying the character is Mexican. Similar jokes may use stereotypical Mexican names like Jose, Pablo, Ricardo or Hector. While some find them harmless, others consider the mockery of Latino names to be in poor taste.

What’s the difference between a Mexican joke and a Hispanic joke?

Technically, Mexican jokes focus on stereotypes about Mexicans specifically, while Hispanic jokes comment on Latin American stereotypes more broadly. However, there is often overlap since Mexico has the largest Hispanic/Latino population.

Are Mexican jokes popular in Mexico?

Yes, Mexicans have their own sense of humor and commonly tell jokes playing off Mexican stereotypes and cultural perspectives within their own communities. However, they may still take offense to jokes from outsiders that feel racist or condescending.

Are there Mexican comedian jokes I can tell?

Absolutely! Jokes and comedy routines by famous Mexican comedians like Eugenio Derbez, Adrian Uribe or Sammy Perez can make great inspirations for witty jokes to retell. Just be sure to credit them if you’re reusing their material.

¡Que tengas un día feliz y lleno de risas! I hope you enjoyed these 100 Mexican jokes for every occasion. Whether you need some family friendly laughs or edgier humor for mature crowds, this list offers funny quips for all. So spread the comedy, and remember laughter is the spice of life! Let me know if you have any other favorite Mexican jokes I should add to my collection.